I sit here as I end the first week of what my doctors are calling “Strict Bed-Rest”…..at the moment I write this, I find myself alone as my mom takes our dishes downstairs to the common area to wash them.
It has been a few hours since my husband has left me…..he had to head back to NYC for a Spanish Pro-Life Congress that is being run by his office at the Archdiocese of NY.
Oh, be still my heart! How I miss him! I can’t help but embrace this moment to pray and to speak with my Lord….”Father, I miss him!”
I hear Him speak to me gently, “Fear not my daughter, for I am with you!”
“But Father, I feel so alone without him here by my side”
“I am with you, know that I am the ONLY one who can truly fulfill you in that deepest of ways…and in these moments of missing your one flesh, hold on to ME!”
At this moment I imagine myself embracing Our Lord….and as I fall more deeply into prayer, I feel the splinters of the Cross stinging my lips…..
….I have to tell you (and I know this might sound crazy) that during my first trimester of pregnancy with Maria Isabella, I heard the Lord speak to me (Andrew is my witness for those of you who might think that I’m schizophrenic!) saying: “Cristina, I want you to carry a Cross for this little Life within you”
Now naturally I’m thinking headaches, nausea, even the progesterone treatments (in extra-large injection form!)….you know, the typical pregnancy symptoms. Boy, was I wrong!
At this point – after finding out the diagnosis and undergoing reparative surgery for Maria Isabella – I now understand more about what His plan is with this “Cross” I will be carrying. I truly feel that the Lord is taking Andrew and I together on a journey to go deeper into understanding this LOVE (Jesus) that was willing to die – and continue to die, daily – for His Love.
I mean….I’ve had to die to myself – literally – in taking up this Cross (whether I liked it or not!) I’ve left my job, family, and friends and have moved to South Jersey…all in the name of taking up this Cross (and embracing it!)
At this point I feel like I have no other choice but to tell God “Take me wherever you want me to go!”
So…I ask all of you to please send me your prayer requests….I have a lot of discomfort/pain/soreness and even nervousness to offer up to Our Lord….so I’d love to add your intentions to that list!!!
Either post your intention here, or send it to me via firstname.lastname@example.org
Oh, and please keep praying for our recovery!!!
Cristina (and little Maria Isabella)